I announced this one briefly on youtube but this version I went more into detail what I want for issue seven despite the fact rusty liar is trying to sabotage both this and Tabloid Purposes V. She is trying to force a folding of the mag but that is far from happening. In fact this issue is going to be the POD-DVD issue (the DVD story guidelines are documentaries of four authors in the area telling their stories how they became writers and show me the areas where they got their inspirations from since this is the local author issue. The DVD is a 4theluv deal plus copies of the DVD.) I pick the four authors in addition to telling some of my story about LAKE FOSSIL PRESS and the stories I will contribute to this is only suitable that I go on location and tell the stories of how The Pattern of Diagnosis was written.

Well what can I say,  been a few years since I actually posted a blog entry on this blog but I will say these days I've been seeing some of my work getting accepted on a few magazines.   I spoke with Misty of Withersin and we were thinking of a way to rework the interview that was done of me, because when I did the interview it was on a crappy computer that didn't have MS Word on it. I am still writing and got a novella accepted to Naked Snake Press last year which is pretty damn cool -- I noticed that a few editors and other published writers are a little cranky about it but you know, fuck them in that sense.
      I also noticed another loser who is going around trying to stir up old shit too.  I try to keep things professional with the blogging but when someone goes around posting slash stories of me it gets personal. I came to the conclusion that his life must really suck right now so he decides to make someone else miserable in the process. Nice try asshole, but I guess your career as a writer went to hell after that little bet that I made. The little fuck works a shitty job at Target somewhere, I am trying to imagine some people who want to play the whole pay to smash up his car deal. Sad acts like him just give me fuel to write more material, so keep talking shit pal because it is just giving me more to be amused about. Some people never grow up.
      If you want to prove you're the better writer then start submitting -- put your money where your mouth is. Instead of taking after shits that glorify the entire slash genre, do something that doesn't even touch that shit.  It is nothing new for me when I deal with people like him, I get impossible shits like him all the time.  I am trying to keep a cool head about it, and do a blog somewhere that is obscure but at the same time hopefully get a crowd that isn't so hostile and tries to spam the shit out of my feed every chance they get.  My opinions of people like him is that he's an obsessed little boy who has too much time on his hands. 
      When I get somewhat successful in the genre, it just seems that jealous bastards like him who get off on trying to pull out a can of worms.  When I see editors like Timothy Leider bitching, it is years worth of venom that I still see as something to laugh about because the sad little bitch can't accept I am getting published in different magazines now.  It just seems I am getting accepted left and right for writing non-fiction.  I think I should go back and try to write that book about my high school years, but the time is the thing that I don't always have or a computer that is reliable (the one that I have at the apartment is slow as fuck for publishing.) 

Well it was a year ago when I went to my class reunion, I never expected the reception I got with the reunion. I never expected a few coming up and apologizing for the hell they put me through, but that was the case here. Especially with the book out there.
          I thought of it going into a Twilight Zone episode so to speak, or so to say. But no matter here I am at the reunion, copies of my books on hand well only one copy and a demo CD of a friend’s industrial band. They never expected a guy with really long black hair with a leather jacket walking into the place because the Nickolaus Pacione they remember was the nerdy kid with the haunted eyes. I sometimes feel like that character in Stephen King’s story, “THE BODY,” being the main character was a writer and his best friend suggested to him if he was hard up for material he could write about his friends.
          Then again, after all the years of being the kid they made fun of – becoming a horror writer was something they never expected. Though one said, “Why doesn’t this surprise one bit?”
          Though I will go into some detail but not a lot, it was strange getting in touch with a few writers on Classmates.com. Though I knew a few people for a long time, but they never expected me to become a writer. The reunion wasn’t all that bad in fact I had a lot of fun and managed to get my friend’s demo played. Coming in from the gothic subculture, it seems to be a whole different world and sometimes it isn’t expected. I learned to expect a lot of the unexpected because of the various web sites I am active with. I started to enter this occupation not knowing many writers but coming into it I ended up publishing at least five writers from the class of 1994 and 1995.
          At first I was the person everyone made fun of for owning Stephen King novels, but here I am now writing something that will turn a few heads here and there especially since I had a morbid curiosity about death and mortality. That fascination with the darker side of life, and basically there was no turning back from there. It started with the encouragement of a classmate at the age of 19, then after the layoff of a factory job the writing thing became more serious. So a lot changed after 10 years, then I was made fun of – now I get dirty looks for challenging some known authors. It is a rite of passage in the underground when it comes to this kind of fiction; there will always be someone who will be gunning for you because of something you’ve written. I am sure some of you who wrote in the school paper can relate to this, and so can a lot of these who’ve been labeled outcasts or as pariahs. So coming from someone who was made fun of for most of their life, you learn to develop a thick skin –– the conditioning is there for an author in the field of Speculative Fiction. Falling into a level of writing the fiction that is just beyond an amateur.
          So when it came time to go to the class reunion, there are a lot of things racing in your head at once. And if you’re a horror writer, you come up with this macabre little things that can or may happen when you’re there. Such as the former prom queen becoming the real life version of a circus show freak, or the former football star flipping burgers at a McDonald’s. Or they come in with a missing arm or a leg – maybe still bleeding too. All the things that made them perfect and popular in high school turning them into the loser, and the ones they picked on in school because they were in a special education class now creating weird fiction. I want to say exactly what I am thinking here, but I have to keep in mind this is a family magazine. Though as I go on, when I called to confirm my reservations at the Class Reunion – I didn’t release how my name goes around, the operator actually recognized me from my story on the Horror Magazine, THE HOUSE OF PAIN.
          A class reunion for a writer can be either their best friend or their worst enemy, especially when it comes to authors of speculative fiction. Though some of the most macabre ideas can come out of high school, and this is always the case with some writers. Though it is hard to keep in touch with everyone from a class reunion, even though you run into a few of them at a Haunted House somewhere on Halloween. Though some people hook up at reunions, though not always the case – sometimes you will find an author you knew from your past, and one might not know you’ve be sharing a table of contents with them or doing your book cover for you.
          It is always different when it comes to everyone else’s class reunion though but when it comes to your own – always expect the unexpected. Especially when reunions will have a mortality wall, what that means is for the students who didn’t live to see their reunion for some odd reason. I am not making a joke here, just that I have the imagination that falls into the strange and macabre. That’s what happens when one hangs around with other horror writers who are even sicker in nature. Moral of the story is this, go into a reunion with an open mind – because one might never know if an old enemy might actually apologize. This is the case here when I went to my reunion – I won’t mention their name here but I want to say thank you for the apology.

The countdown is on -- my first appearence at a major event,   I got a booth and everything.  Why is this big for me it is because it is my home area!   Du Page County in September 17, 2005,  is confirmed.  I will be at the Goth Expo.  This is my official book signing as well for TABLOID PURPOSES II as well as other respective anthologies I appeared on or edited.  I will be getting flyers ready for this event but never did the flyer before,  well an attempt a flyer but I want to do this right.  So if you want your copy of TABLOID PURPOSES II signed -- show up with it because I will have limited copies of each book with me,  the only one I won't have on me is Stories of the Apparitions,  I will have copies of Quakes and Storms by then as well.  I am getting the personel their copies as well but that will take some time,  won't be as many authors as both TABLOID PURPOSES but I am going to be cutting it pretty damned close.  The authors who are left to be paid will get their money next month first thing on the third of June.  I will be paying for my booth on the fourth of the month.
                  I am hoping I can have both copies ready for the convention as well.   I am going to find a way to donate all proceeds to the Red Cross on the physical copies at the convention.   I will get something going for that as well,   as in they will get a copy of Quakes and Storms if they donate.  The Mission statement for TABLOID PURPOSES II and I are for networking purposes especially if writers want to get published they can look at authors on there who are also editors.   This was really a first time for me to be publishing editors as contributing autors on this.   I will be getting the flesh and blood copies to members, but it will be about three at a time.  TP II members will be getting their copies in October after the expo, or if members appear at the expo I will give their copies to them in person.  Authors who contributed to Quakes and Storms with stories that didn't fit the natural disaster theme, they went into TABLOID PURPOSES II.
                I am talking about flesh and blood copies here, not the "free pirated" versions that are going around.   I am talking with the guy who is organizing the event and after seeing the second Tabloid Purposes, he thought it would be a good idea to get me on there.    So here's the deal -- I am looking for someone who has a van and willing to make $80 for the day,  I will be paying the driver ahead of time to help me cart my books to Villa Park from Joliet and back.  I will pay the driver via paypal the amount after my booth payment is paid in full.  The booth I am going have is a high traffic one,  and they will set up the book signing at a certain hour and want to make sure it is before the bands do their gigs.   I need to get there early too so I can set everything up and need to make it look cool as hell,  so if you want to give me input to make my booth scary as hell shoot an email my way.   I am thinking of my booth being covered with TABLOID NEWSPAPERS to go with the theme of TABLOID PURPOSES I and II.   I am just trying to figure out all the information for the Expo so I can put it on a flyer.  The guy will be doing an announcement on his website.  I won't be announcing it here but if you're part of the yahoogroups,  I will be making the announcement over there.   With this coming up, getting copies for everyone will take a little longer.
                 Nervous about this -- damn right I am,  though working with my parents at their craft shows and at a flea market sort of gave me some experience in that area of working a booth.  So this is where it all comes down to -- being able to go to my first convention as an author.   This thing is a one day event and an all day thing from 11 AM to Midnight.  I am going to be there the whole time too,  so if you see me from U.S. Beer Company drop by and say hello, or flip me the bird (if you hate my guts.)  This is more than likely will be just me doing the event but I am trying to get some from TABLOID PURPOSES II on board for this too if they are local,  so bring your books as well.   Bring your copies of New Writers of the Purple Page and I will sign them too.  Now here I am working on a new story,  finding out LAKE FOSSIL II is going to be my first real exclusive story to a paying market.  
               This new story I am working on though will be my first real colaboration effort too as an author -- the first ones were good in the sense how I managed to work with them,  I got a feel for their writing styles too.   Working with Aaron Saunders,   I had to bring out my influence of Richard Matheson.  Michael Lovell the style was more in the touches of Lord Dunsay with him, so it was a workable colaboration but the story was lost -- now I got an email from Nicholas Mounts and Ronald Wright saying they want to co-write stories with me.  The Ron Wright colaboration will easy become a Cthulhu Mythos story,   Mounts will be a harder author to colaborate with but it is possible.   This is a challenge in itself especially since I am working on a story that isn't a horror story, but more of a literary fiction story in the vein of Jules Verne and William Hope Hodgson.   I read a lot of Verne's work as a kid,  so going back into that influence was almost easier than going into the Mythos mode.   I am finding Science Fiction just as fun to write as Horror is,  but I am no fucking egghead though.  Do I see myself writing a Science Fiction novel -- if I do this style it would be more in common with H.G. Wells because he wrote what they called Social Science Fiction,  namely I don't have the tech smarts.  

Working on a literary fiction story that has a vibe of a Science Fiction, then again you throw a Jules Verne influence in there for good measure this will be the challenging aspect for me especially I want to do the story accessable enough for a magazine almost running Lake Fossil II.   I don't want to give them another Lake Fossil but this will be something very different in nature.   So far the word count on this one is close to 2600 words,   making some good timing with it.  It will be too long for that magazine Macey sent her story to.  I was actually thinking about sending it there myself but by the looks of this one I am easy going to hit a 5000 word mark,  because this is just my part of the story being written. 
               I am going to send it two other authors to work on as well either two pending on who is available to work on the story.  I say it like this because both had shown interest in co-writing with me on a story.  One of the authors I had a story I was working on but both our computers died and it was lost.   Then the other one approached me after releasing TABLOID PURPOSES II.   I did one colaboration in my years as an author.   It is a hard thing to do because sometimes the styles aren't too compatable.   When working with Aaron G. Saunders,   I was going into a Richard Matheson mode when writing my parts into A Tale of Romanian Chairs.   The story came off of a story I wrote titled The Cabbie Homicide.   But writing this one,   it was going back into territory I've not stepped into since I was a teen.   I played with the idea of wanting to write a nautical fiction,  it gets addicting.
             Horror will always be in my blood,  this one will have a slight horror element but this isn't a horror story though.   It is a story that cannot be pigeonholed into one genre.  Literary Fiction is the coin for this one,  much as Lake Fossil is coined as Creature Literary.   I liked that coin for it because it just seemed to work.    Then when I got the proofs back for Halloween On Camera -- I liked the new genre tag for it,  Gothic Literary.  That was exactly what I was going for when I wrote the story. Back to this story though,  it is titled Norwood's Discovery.    I am not even sure what this one will be like in its entirely yet because this is just my parts I am working on. 
            The coin on the new story Utica, Illinois, is going to be  Horror but the question will be what is the subgenre it would fall into -- it will be hard to put a subgenre tag on this one because it has elements of disaster story and elements of a macabre horror story in there.  This one is going to be a real challenge for me,  every bit of it is written in the third person and uses a lot of dialog.  I want to see what happens with this story when it is all said and done though; thinking this will allow me to cross over into other genres as a writer.   That advice Grimmett gave me when he was alive has its way of writing itself out.   Play around with different subject matter, and it has a way of capturing the readers imagination.   I am just waiting to see what happens with this because it is a good sign,  if I can get as much done myself as possible then pass it to a colaborator.   I am just hoping the possible colaborators can keep the style true to its form or if they want to add to the paragraphs they can as well;  but who knows how this story would turn out and when I do submit it to magazines they must be open to an email submission because this will be an easier story to submit that way.

 Enough is enough,   I am tired of these people going around creating cute little communities slandering my name  -- "fan sites" as they call them,  if they were a fan site then they would not go around using my name as a urinal.   People coming on stealing my posts from one blog to the next, then the mean and spiteful reviews every chance they get.  
               The shit with the bitch I won't mention by name was the straw that cracked me, but I am not going to go cussing everyone out every chance I get.  I try to get new material out there then these idiots go around trying to offer pirated versions of Tabloid Purposes II. You had no right to be distributing the anthology if you didn't contribute a story or edit it.  In all seriousness, what is destroying me going to prove?  Then going around stealing my covers and bastardizng them to their perverse little need.  
              I want this shit to stop because clearly it isn't fun having to fight with every cum gulping schmuck out there.  They say I go around hating common sense and clarity, they cleary hate it more than me.  Their idea of common sense is a bit twisted,  what kind of logic do they find in mocking me or impersonating my family.   If you have an issue with me -- leave my family out of it.
              White flag -- I am not the one to surrender but seriously,  I want this to end.   Going around stalking me from one forum to the next,  stealing my online personas via yahoo.   I am addressing every asshat out there who thinks it is funny going on as my alter ego, characters from my work, or as my story's titles.  Every person who practiced e-piracy deserves a punch in the head.
              This is nothing new,  same bullshit another name.  Am I going to mend the bridges I burned, I will try to keep civil but seriously those who've created threads slandering me or journals that slander me better stay the hell out of my way. I might have a mouth on me, but I won't let that destroy my career. Will I stop with the vulgarity,  no because that is just the way I am.  Point fingers at me;  I will point one back and it won't be pleasing either.  Some might not get my logic, but the ones who would understand this are the ones who've been around me the longest and in person. I am exactly the way I am in person I am online. 
             This bothers some people,  especially if they hate my persona online.   The whole thing about them wanting to,  "burn the monster."  That is what wants me to do this kind of rant.   I've seen this too many times.   I am not about to come out to be a kiss ass either,  that was something I never was brought up to be.  I do find myself being on the brunt of a lot of things, but sometimes I don't care.  Though when someone decides to get personal and try to create something extremely slanderous, as what the Truth Abuth Nick is doing.   Every bit of it is not true,   I don't even wear slippers and that little picture he doctored of the magazine was really of me holding a copy of Tabloid Purposes I.   They thing this is going to silence me by stealing my posts -- wrong.   I am a mouth, and say exactly what is on my mind no matter how offensive it will come out to be.